2013 gave me unearthing. It tossed up all my beliefs, limitations, accusations, assumptions, egocentric definitions and illusion-filled vantages. All was crumbled and in gentle pause right at my feet. Thin and translucent fragments rested on the ground before me and before I could lean in to dissect, a strong wind gushed in blowing all into the nothingness.
All is transformed in the nothingness.
It goes back to zero; back to blankness. But in the process, a memory remains, like ...the soul. This doesn't mean you have to kill it or rid yourself from it. And, no...since you've asked, you are not less enlightened because you might have pockets full of this. To carry the memory and affix it under a new light is a brave willingness to be aware and honor your path, your own right path, but at the same time surrendering to it's ever-changing ways. It's a bit of a pose to hold, but it expands you. How will you see your stories? Do they sit well in your current flow or do they disrupt with a wave or two? Is it shaky ground? Can you decipher a message in it? can you dance to the tune playing in the background? This is the journey that is twirling me into this coming new year.
There has been much rewriting and much reclaiming.
There has also been many tantrums and lists of unfairs, don't-want-to's and why-should-I's.
Yet, who would I be without this buffing? This sanding down of the old layers...only to reveal new skin.
A new year gives a clean slate. What stories have migrated, which ones have transmuted or transformed? Which can I continue to work with. Which ones seems hard to shake? I find life much more exciting that I can change up (of course, with work, and the peeling of layers) the energy of things that feel weighty.
But please know this, when you are in the process, don't resist the process!
Sometimes the process is blood, sweat and tears. Sometimes you feel like everything you've worked for was a waste of time. Sometimes you even think you have it figured out only to find yourself at the beginners place...again.
You are magic and have the ability to reset the tone.
It's evident in nature. Our Grandmother Moon reminds us of this. She goes through the phases gracefully. My prayer for 2014 is that I can embrace this movement. Come with? Dance with me?